Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Willie Randolph Guest Post

Hey, Dynamo, eat my tits. Has a graph ever won a baseball game? Look at's standings from a year ago. Did 'statistics' win the NL East? FUCK NO! It was the Metropolitans! You can say that the Mets won because they 'scored a ton of runs' and 'let up few runs' and that W-L record in and of itself is a 'statistic' and to that I say, 'we must agree to disagree.' I didn't see a graph hit a walk-off drag bunt last night, or hit the game tying homer in the bottom of the 10th, those were 'my guys' that did that. And they did it with grit, heart and determination with a side of hustle and scrap. So the next time you see Carlos (either one) bunt with the bases loaded and two outs to move the runners over, don't cite 'win-probability' to me or 'average-run-score' or whatever newfangled statistic you've found that is literally revolutionizing baseball. Just know that I played this motherloving game at the MAJOR LEAGUE level for 18 seasons and have coached it for another 14. That's right, 32 years of MAJOR LEAGUE EXPERIENCE (in the bigs we capitalize MAJOR LEAGUE. We also call it the bigs, never the show like that wannabe Ron Shelton made up. Or so I've heard, I'd never watch any movie that casts Danny Gans) tells me that bunting is the right play all the time! Bunting and letting your pitchers hit in key situations, that's how you win ballgames. Not with graphs, statistics, voodoo, or any other crap you, Bill James (inventor of 'fantasy baseball!' HA! It'll be a fantasy for that fat bearded bastard to ever get into a front office), Voros McCracken (more like Voros My Crack Hurts from pooping out bad statistics), Ron Shandler, Joe Sheehan (Baseball Prospectus my ASS! a prospectus is a guy like Lasto Millings, wait that's not right...what's his name...Lastoff...Lastout...Lastings...shoot I always do this... aww hell, we'll just call him Shawn Green) and Billy Beane (who Joe Morgan tells me wrote a book about himself) have come up with. Bunts win ballgames, end of Q&A.

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