Friday, January 30, 2009

Abbreviated up butt jumping: Manny Ramirez jumps half way up GMDB's butt

As the off season drags on and Mets fans start getting restless, the dumbos of the crowd all start clamoring for Omar to execute increasing dumber ideas, like overpaying for Man-Ram at the expense of other more pressing needs.

It's stuff like that that make Metsblog impossible to get into these days. This is the same place where you can still find Paul Lo Duca superfans, lurking in the comments, ready to pounce on anyone for making racist, anti-italian comments about baseball's greasiest piece of shit in baseball history.

Anyway, Metsblog is still a great compiler of Mets news and its run by good people and whatever but seriously, look at the results of those reader surveys. Fucking imbicility of magnitude proportions.

I get the appeal of Manny, and the Mets would definitely score more runs with him in the lineup, but the return on investment would not be as great as if they signed someone like Ben Sheets, or probably even Oliver Perez. First of all, Manny's horrendous defense needs to be factored in, wiping out a great deal of his value. Second of all, any pitcher signed not only adds the value they would contribute to the staff, but it also bumps an inferior pitcher, like Niese or someone equally crappy, out of the rotation. So there is a multiplying affect.

All right, I'm already getting bored with this discussion. Fuck it, I don't give a shit anymore. Here are 2 more Manny pic I made.

Hey how about a couple links to OTHER BLOGS? Sure why not.

This dude posted some pics of the end of Shea Stadium. Kind of sad but not really. I've got some great memories of Shea, but that stadium was also a real piece. One time I went to Shea for a my 8th birthday and a bird shat on my sneaker. GREAT STORY RIGHT?

The Cardinals can all get fucked with telephone poles, but this is pretty sweet. Well done St. Louisians. Now go back to being that fat stupid unimaginative redecks you are.

Anyone remember the epic cinematic thunderstrike known as Fear, staring Marky Mark of the Funky Bunch? It's pretty terrible. I don't remember much of what it's even about but I definitely remember the scene where Markus Markovitch fingerblasts Reese Witherspooge while riding a rollercoaster. That actually made it into a hollywood movie. Can graphic depictions of OTPHJs be far behind? We can only hope.

Anyway that crappy movie was on HBO recently and I was lucky enough to tune in to the scene that featured this powerhouse alt-grunge-industrial-rock track:

Ah, the mid 90's. I can't wait until all my plaid flannel is fashionable again. Come on 2010's, let's get the 90's retro bus started!

And to even it out, here is a totally fruity song from the same era. What's this song about anyway, rape? Sounds like it's about a raping. That's fucked up, man. That song gets played at Bar Mitzvahs and shit. Don't play a rape song at Bar Mitzvahs. Come on!

OK I'm spent and it's Friday. Time to drink and watch the superbowl and drink. May all your SB parties involve this snack sensation or something equally fan-fucking-tastic.


1 comment:

Philly Sucks said...

If you had to have a cordial dinner affair, and you were given the choice of Shane Victorino or Pauly Lo Dukes, who would you pick? You can't poison or issue bodily harm either.

Nobody has ever topped Double Dragon 2 for beat 'em up goodness.

It's fitting that you mention Markie Mark fingering High School Age girls, and talk about Big Pud in the same post.